5 Books That Will Make You a Better Networker

Whether you’re brand new to building business relationships, or you’re an experienced networker, here are five books that have shaped how Network My Club’s Founder and Managing Director, Bradley Hatchett, approaches networking and traits he’s noticed from the most successful networkers.

Human beings are complex. Building strong business relationships doesn’t always come easily to everyone. Many factors are at play when networking. First impressions, how you communicate, how you listen, what you say, how you say it, your approach… after all, networking is a skill, not a one-size-fits-all activity.

1. Never Eat Alone – Keith Ferrazzi

This book should be a bible for anyone looking to make their networking more efficient – those already in the industry and those just starting out. It has so many actionable tips about developing new relationships and nurturing existing ones. Ferrazzi’s lifestyle in maintaining his relationships is thorough, extreme and pretty relentless, but the results speak for themselves. Taking just a few of his tangible methods will positively affect your ‘Relationship Action Plan’ as he calls it.

Key Takeaway: ‘Build it before you need it’. The idea is that you should be networking before you need something, rather than when you do. You should always be building your network, being able to tap into different corners of your network when you can help someone or when you are seeking something.

2. Chimp Paradox – Steve Peters

This book taught me more about communicating and understanding different personality types than any other I’ve read. It changed the way I observe, interact and share with people. When networking, I’d encourage becoming a chameleon and adapting to your surroundings and who you are speaking to. You meet a lot of different types of people when you’re networking, and Peters’ Chimp Paradox helps you prepare for that. 

For me, being able to manage different conversations successfully has all stemmed from the Chimp Paradox. It helped me understand why you react emotionally to certain things and how to manage and recognise that in yourself and others. 

Key Takeaway: ‘Gremlins’ are what Steve Peters explains as beliefs or ideas about specific people or ideas that we hold, and can really affect your relationships. Our opinions on someone’s size of business, the industry they work in, and their job title can give you a closed-off mindset if they don’t suit your agenda. You never know who knows who when networking, and any exchange can lead to something (if you ask the right questions). I’ve learned never to judge or assume something about anyone.

For example, I met a lady who worked part-time in a network marketing company with a poor reputation on the networking circuit. However, we got chatting and ended up discussing her previous career. 

She was previously on the board of a FTSE 100 company and was in her current position to balance work with bringing up her two young children. She introduced me to three or four great people from her previous career, whom I’ve since added to my network or worked with. 

And I’ve never forgotten it. Never write anyone off. Let go of your Gremlins. 

3. Atomic Habits – James Clear

Networking should be a habit; it’s all about consistency and being in it for the long term. We talk about that a lot with our community and onboarding new members. If you want short-term gains and do not attend events often, you’ll simply join the hundreds of others in the ‘networking doesn’t work’ club.

This book teaches the importance of implementing good habits by blocking out parts of your diary to ensure you attend events regularly. Then when you are at an event, build good habits that make your time worthwhile.

Key Takeaway: “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become”. Think of the type of person or business you want to become. Want to become more connected, better informed and a key person of influence in your industry? Attending a networking event is a habit you can build into your activity to achieve that and is a ‘vote’ towards that goal.  

4. How to Make Friends and Influence People – Dale Carnegie

This was one of the first personal development books I read as I started Network My Club – and I’m so glad it was. 

It’s had a massive impact on me – how I interact with people, develop and nurture relationships, and live day-to-day.

There’s a reason this is one of the best-selling and most influential books of all time. Written in 1936, the principles are as true today as back then. 

Key Takeaway: Highlighting the most important thing that belongs to anyone – their name. It’s simple to remember someone’s name but so powerful. I try to do this with anyone I meet. One tip to remember someone’s name; say it three times in conversation when you’ve first met them. You could start with; Hi John, nice to meet you. So, John, what problem does your business solve? That’s interesting, John; I’ve found that too.

5. Never Split the Difference – Chris Voss

As chief hostage negotiator for the FBI, Chris Voss knows how to ask the right questions. For him, it’s a matter of life and death. Thankfully, networking isn’t quite like that. However, asking the right questions will make your networking experience more positive and fruitful. 

Being prepared going into an event with practical questions up your sleeve is a hugely valuable part of the networking process. It’ll help your experience and those on the receiving end of the questioning. Rather than; “Have you been to this event before?’ How about; “What do you hope to achieve from being at this event today?” It starts with genuine curiosity, asking the right questions to elicit the most thought-provoking and productive responses. 

Key Takeaway: Voss’ skill of ‘tactical empathy’. It’s about listening. Understanding the other person’s viewpoint and making them feel heard. Arguably, it’s one of the most powerful skills you can demonstrate when networking. 

Looking to up your networking game? We can show you how – explore our membership options or book a call with one of our friendly team at NMC today by visiting www.networkmyclub.co.uk