The two types of networkers you meet networking

Bradley Hatchett, Founder of Network My Club, shares the difference between being a battery charger and a battery drainer at networking events. 

How good does this feel when networking? Walking away from a conversation at an event feeling buoyant, energised and motivated. Thinking that person was great to be around. You’re charged up, full of energy, you can’t wait for next time.

But I bet you’ve been here too… Leaving a conversation feeling flat, uninspired, sapped of your energy. Thinking that you couldn’t wait to leave the conversation. Feeling drained.

Ever thought why that might be? It comes down to two different personality types in social interactions. That I refer to as ‘Battery Chargers’ and ‘Battery Drainers’.

Battery Chargers

Think back to a time you’ve been at a networking event, or any social gathering for that matter. You leave thinking ‘that person was great to be around, I really enjoyed their company’. You’ve likely been around a battery charger.

With battery chargers – you leave feeling energised, inspired, motivated, happier, and you want to be around them.

In conversation, you find yourself more animated, expressive, and generally smiling more. You feel yourself being charged up.

At networking, they tend to demonstrate these traits:

• Ask questions

• Be positive and see the upside

• Offer advice, ideas and share value

• Bring others into conversations

• Listen and make you feel heard

• Are curious and show genuine interest

• Celebrate the success of others

• Find ways to lift others

• Kind and considerate

Close your eyes and picture this kind of person. Does someone come to mind?

I can think of a handful of people immediately. These are the sort of people you want to be around. And those you look forward to being around. They are the sort of people you see on an event guest list and immediately think it’d be good to see them. Or you see them as you walk into a room and head straight towards.

Compared to the opposite…

Battery Drainers

Battery drainers, on the other hand, are individuals who drain the energy of others with their negative attitude, complaints or outlook. You feel the life being sucked out of you.​ 

You’re resisting the urge to look around to find another conversation or someone that could save you. Counting down the seconds before you can excuse yourself and move on. Or start thinking of excuses to leave the conversation. You look down and your coffee cup is full. You’ve been to the toilet. Fake phone call?

You eventually leave feeling drained and demotivated after your interaction. And thankful you’re finally out of the conversation. Why is that? What do you need to look out for?

​Battery drainers often:

• Talk more than they listen

• Don’t ask questions

• Quick to complain, moan or criticise

• See the downside

• Listen to reply – not understand

• Think ‘what’s in it for me?’

• Show no interest and make it about them

• Take more than give

Try to get ‘one up’ (if you’ve been to Tenerife, they’ve been to ‘Elevenerife’)

If you’re on the receiving end of this, sound the alarm. Code red. Excuse yourself politely and get out of that conversation now.

Some of those traits are more obvious to spot than others. You may have even identified ones you often slip into. That’s OK, being aware of them and changing it is part of the process.

​The good news is, that can change.

How to be more Charger than Drainer

I’m not suggesting you have to go into every event as the most charismatic, energetic, or inspiring person.

There are simple ways to act, or considerations to be aware of to be more charger than drainer. It involves making conscious efforts to shift your mindset and behaviour when networking.

You are a walking billboard for your business when networking. And how you project yourself is a representation of your brand.

Here are a few considerations:

Take a genuine interest in others. Ask questions and lead with curiosity. You never know what they’ve done, what they’re into, or who they know. Instead of making conversations about you, ask questions about them and show genuine interest in their business and lives.

Avoid complaining. Resist. The. Urge. Even if it’s pouring outside, or the traffic was bad, find ways to focus on something positive. These negative behaviours drain the energy of others and leave a negative impact. Including criticising and gossiping too. Leave it at home or the office.

Listen to understand, not reply. You were given one mouth and two ears. Don’t forget to use the latter. Good networking isn’t just about your exercising your speaking skills, but your listening skills too. Actively listening makes others feel heard. That charges them up.

Root for others. With genuine curiosity, find out about what others are working on, what’s exciting them, and getting them charged up. Offer encouragement whenever you can. Celebrate their successes. Positivity breeds positivity.

Leave value. Suggest a relevant podcast, book or article. Offer some advice (if appropriate). Make an introduction. Recommend another event or group to check out. Make your interaction a worthwhile, valuable, and memorable one.

Bring others into conversations. Facilitate introductions between other guests you feel could benefit from knowing each other. Bring them into your conversation. Often people are hesitant to join a conversation midway through. This has two benefits, it charges the people you introduce, and feels great for you. Win, win!

Be kind. Simple, effective, costs nothing. On the surface at networking events, everyone is doing well. But you never know what people are going through. If all else fails – kindness always wins.

Next time you’re walking into a networking event or joining a conversation, ask yourself; are you going to charge people’s batteries? Or drain them?

I’ll leave you with the famous quote from Maya Angelo: “People don’t remember what you said or what you do. But they remember how you made them feel.”

Leave them feeling charged. Go and charge up your networking and relationships.

www.networkmyclub.co.uk